How is it relevant?

My friends tease me that my pseudonym is “How is it relevant”. I use this phrase very often and for most situations because it helps focus my mind. Let me share this secret with you.
Scene 1. The boss is firing the hell out of a person and the person is miserable.
Scene 2. The boss is miserable because the subordinate is not delivering.
Scene 3. The entrepreneur is spending a sleepless night because of tough calls required that would impact everyone’s life negatively in the short term.
Scene 4. A friend or a partner fights with you for no reason and one wonders what happened?

The normal human instinct and reaction is to lash out and let loose the anger and frustration that such situations obviously release. It is quite natural for anyone in such situation to feel alone, bereft and angry.
It is at this juncture that one needs to remember, “How is it relevant?”. Let’s replay the scenes with the ‘how is it relevant’ context.

Scene 1. “The boss is firing the hell out of a person and the person is miserable”. The boss has been a great enabler in the past and will be so again. So, how is it relevant that he is angry now? Or, the boss has been an insecure joker and anyways, you are looking out for a job, so how is it relevant? Anyways, nowadays, we don’t spend our lives in a single job and definitely not with a single boss. So, how is it relevant?

Scene 2. “The boss is miserable because the subordinate is not delivering”. The boss has had several subordinates and will have many more. If the subordinate does not deliver, move on. How is it relevant? A leader needs to do their best to get the team to deliver and grow. However, if the team is following Murphy’s Law of having risen to the heights of their incompetence, what can an individual do? How is it relevant?

Scene 3. “The entrepreneur is spending a sleepless night because of tough calls required that would impact everyone’s life negatively in the short term”. Either the promoter has focussed on the welfare of people before or not. If the welfare has not been the focus, the tough call is a confirmation of the promoter’s selfishness, else it’s a reaffirmation of the promoter’s focus on the overall good and growth of the team and organisation. Sleepless nights; How is it relevant?

Scene 4. “A friend or a partner fights with you for no reason and one wonders what happened?” Like the promoter example, there have been great times before or not. If there exist memories of great times, then how is the fight relevant? If not and you are going to move on, again how is the fight relevant?

Every event in our life is but a turning point. The fork we choose is based on what has happened before as also the fact that nothing is permanent.

So, getting too involved in the present and getting too involved, especially negatively is just not worth the time and effort. Ask someone who has lived long enough and most situations in life would evoke a memory of having handled it by saying “How is it relevant?”.

We often realise this in hindsight. My suggestion is to use this approach through life and make better choices with regards to how we react to situations. Hope you enjoyed this article. Anyways, “How is it relevant?”

I enjoyed sharing this thought!